I don’t know why I let myself slip back into all these old patterns and habits, I guess it’s because I was happy for the first time in a long time and now the source of my happiness will be someone else’s. I really shouldn’t care but I do and that’s what worries me. fuck it I guess. it’s easier to live without emotion than to struggle with sadness till the day you die. that’s the reason I guess the cap on my emotions is better than yours, ive stopped feeling and embraced the numb…
